There is always going to be ups and downs and life is almost always never fair. What does it take for someone to throw in the towel, say "Fuck this, I deserve better!" And change their lives? How bad does it have to get for one to make that choice? And why don't they when it does get 'that' bad? What are we scared of? Failure..? Or is saying "I fear failure" just the sissy way out of coming to terms that they are really scared of success? I can admit I am scared shitless of success, not because I think I can't get there but because it is a whole of a hell lot easier to accept less then what I am capable of and 'failing' then to maintain the level of success I can achieve. Once I get to success I am going to have higher standards and set my goals higher, so will I ever achieve my level of success I want if once I get there it keeps being raised??
*I AM throwing in my towel and changing my damn life*
This choice is one that once made an wave of questions come to play. "Where do I start?" "Is there anyone bringing me down in life?" "What if" so where do you start in tackling the questions. You can't just "wing it" when you're trying to change. There has to be a plan, big or small. That's where I am stuck... All the damn questions and choices to make and it seems like now that I am trying to get on my feet and make shit right, everyone and their mothers come out of the wood works to push me down or make me feel bad about myself.... Even people I thought to have been close friends.
It's time I focus on ME and my family and essentially stop giving a fuck about you, him and her.
